What Happens?

I was going from blog to blog this afternoon as I usually do when the emails come through to say that there has been a new post. I spotted one by Land of Fun which was titled Friendship Into Love and after reading it, I got to thinking (which really hurts as my brain isn’t normally used for thinking ;-))

We have friends through our lives, and these friends come and go, then come again and sometimes go again. What about when you fall for one of these friends? Do you fall for them because of what you see inside them? Do you fall for them because of a kinship? Do you fall for them because of loneliness, or do you fall for them because you really do love them?

When you get that stage where they are the first thing you think of in the morning; where they are last thing you think of before going to bed; where every time you think of them, you feel like your heart is about to explode out of your chest and you can hardly breath. When you think of them and you nearly cry because of how much they mean to you. When you try to imagine a life without them and you feel a hole so deep that nothing can ever fill again.

This starts as a friendship, and turns into this. Do you dare tell your friend? Do they think the same way about you? How would you know? Do you suffer in silence or do you start to drop hints? What if you have never met this person? With all the mediums we have available to us now – Facebook, Twitter, WordPress, Blogger, Google+, Type Pad, MySpace. It is easy to get into someone’s life and know them. Is it still love when this happens?

Then you tell your friend, and as it happens, they feel the same way about you, and you cry tears of joy and hold each other in your arms for what seems like hours, and then you talk and talk and talk more than you have ever done before. You start to see more of each other.

Then the unthinkable happens – you realise it was never really love, it was loneliness. What happens with your friendship then? Does it depend on how long you were together for? If you were together for a long time, then it is almost a forgone conclusion that you will no longer be able to talk. However, if it is less than a month or so, and nothing “intimate” happens, then can they stay friends? Will they want to?

When talking to someone online, it is a completely different story. Talking online you don’t see everything. You only see the side that the other person wants you to see. Take me for example. Am I really a male? Am I really 45? Do I really have children? Am I tall, short, rotund, lean, muscle bound, wafer thin? Do I wear glasses? Do I wear contact lenses? Am I blind? Deaf? Am I Hindi, Muslim, Christian, Agnostic, Pagan, Atheist, Druid? You don’t know. Aside from the fact that I do not have any photos of me, I could be anybody. So could other people you speak to. Are they really their photos you are looking at. How can you fall for someone you don’t know when the only thing they are showing you is the side they want you to see.

I’d love to know what you think.